Unneeded Movie Reviews - Predator (1987)

I’M BACK! Hey podcastage, Pete here with an unneeded and unwarranted review of a movie that came out 28 years ago. It’s called Predator, and it’s good. So good that Bandrew and I watched it twice in a row. Not like two nights in a row, or two movie nights in a row, this was literally dead to rights 2 times in a row. The credits rolled and we were so stoked and pumped we started it back up immediately and gave each other high fives. I also remember wearing a really loud obnoxious neon t shirt, but we’ll try to forget that.

Let me start this review with my score of the movie – 0 AHHNOLDS out of 10.

Why so low? Because Predator isn’t a movie, this is an experience. An experience on the level of your first kiss, when you have a child born, or when you have a really good sandwich. This could quite literally be a watershed moment in your life. Predator is one of the greatest things that will ever happen to you.

Why so awesome? Great question. First off just take a look at the IMDB page for this movie. Let me quote what has to be the best main plot keywords of any movie: “Jungle; Severed Arm; Death of Friend”. That alone answers the awesome question.

Predator is a great example of Arnold’s golden years of action movies. He spouts one liners at a rate that makes no sense. He hangs out in a really non-sexual/really sexual way with a bunch of totally yoked bros. Arnold and Carl Weathers high five with such power and ferocity I actually checked the USGS earthquake log for the summer of ’87 just to see if there was some unfounded 8.0 Richter scale earthquake. Also fun fact, a lot of guys in this movie became state governors after making this movie.

Ridiculousness aside, this is a pretty great man vs. beast flick (I mean experience). John McTiernan, the lens flare maestro (also dude who did Die Hard), did a superb job with pacing and letting the badasses just be badasses without a whole lot of filler, or story. Once the Predator gets the involved, everyone dies (sans Arnold) and next thing you know Arnold is covered in mud punching the Predator in the face. I’m not a film study major so give me a break if I’m not good at talking about the finer points of film criticism.

Really do yourself a favor and go rent this movie now! You’ll have fun, and all your dreams will come true. Predator is the standard to which all action movies are held to, and you are also held to that standard. Yell words down below if you want to. Have a great week!